I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
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