Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
So I got offered a job this morning based on being a "good role model for girls" and I am drunk at 330 in the afternoon in "celebration." sometimes, life is insane. But not so bad.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Randomize
