i woke up this morning in my bathroom,naked, with my boxers around my face and puke and shit on the floor and wondering why i didn't have a toenail on my one big toe.
compared to you, a hobo is quite responsible.
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
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