can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
Randomize
