wakey wakey hands off snakey
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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