it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
A homeless man just asked me if I had seen any "nekkid chicks with heineken bottles run by"
Berkeley was the right choice
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
