This dress was meant to end up on your floor
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You'll be the guy with the raft that sells burritos on the river. You'd be legendary.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
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