Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
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