so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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