Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm in the woods tripping balls the water is rising why don't you answer me
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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