Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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