I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
I should be sponsored by Trojan
I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Haha. I got you. I always pay you back somehow. Do you accept all major forms of payment: cash, taco bell, and patriotic underwear?
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
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