margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
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