I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
i woke up surrounded by junior mints. not to mention, there was a huge pyramid of natty cans baracading the door shut. this is why i can't drink alone.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
You dont lie about slip and slides
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
Just copped mushrooms from a dude in a business suit. U comin or what?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
why is half of my head shaved?
Randomize
