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Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
shape ups are the best shoes to wear when youre stoned. its like walking on little trampolines every step.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
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