pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
My 40 year old neighbors are throwing a party for their eight year old niece's birthday. It's 1am and they're still partying hard. Harder than me. It's Saturday. Just say it, I'm a disgrace to the generation.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
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i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
The countdown is at hand. We are 15 days from so much Jameson that names will be forgotten. Prepare your liver now or severe projectile vomiting will be the theme of the night.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
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I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
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