hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
By early evening I was shouting at the deeply Christian girl to suck my dick inbetween snorting lines of gatorade powder.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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