Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
I just found a GIANT thermos of sangria in my sink. I don't know if its still good to drink, but its good to drink.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm going to crush up my last 7 Percocets into a fine powder and toss my popcorn in it.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
Randomize