we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Too much gin, very little bucket
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
