her vagine was all disorganized.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
Not yoga, whiskey. Totally mis-typed whiskey.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Randomize