All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize