i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
at wine tasting. Can i cleanse my Palate with a frito?
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Call it slutty but I take pride in being a first round draft pick booty call. And I know I was first cause he texted me at 1030a
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
Randomize
