That was definitely a porn plot just waiting to develop...
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
Randomize
