So drunk i had to piss sitting down...
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize