She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
My ex's psycho new girlfriend found my vibrator I forgot at his place. Apparently she didn't find it as funny as I did. 😂
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
I may not have my dignity, pride or sanity but I have my pants.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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