He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
Bank of America texted me 7 times in 12 hours to say my balance was below $50. I kept transfering money back in. Then I texted my bank saying that it was okay, i knew what I was doing.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
