there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
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