I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Found the puke drawer
I pulled my bra outta my purse. Covered in honey mustard. I still lack an explanation.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
I cannot handle Xanax... I just turned my computer on and I googled how to work YouTube
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Randomize
