It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
