she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
Randomize
