dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
Apparently the cops had to handcuff me in order to get me to come with to the hospital with them. They asked me if I had had any experience with handcuffs before and I replied, "Only in bed." What a life
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