So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
you gave me money for the cab and then walked home..
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize
