That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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