sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
He called me at 4am to ask me to marry him, then threw up into the phone for 10 minutes.
I need to sanitize my soul.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I want to have sex in my car again before I put the car seat back in
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
You cannot ask her to resend the picture of her genital tattoo to you just so you can show your room mate. it is time to end your relationship with the Captain.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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