he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
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mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
She looked at me and said there is a 90% chance I am going to puke in the next 10 minutes. 10 minutes later she is in jack in the box throwing up. She has amazing timing.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
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Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.