yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
