I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Yo dont text me then not text me
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
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