I'm so fucking centered right now
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
People in love make me want to vomit
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
Randomize
