he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Remember that time we were in the handicap bathroom snorting Molly at the stripclub. That was a defining moment in our friendship
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
Randomize
