Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
animal crackers drenched in taco bell mild sauce... surprisingly delightful
breakfast of champions
breakfast of stoners
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
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