I really want to fuck my wifes sister.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
Thou shall not celebrate other people's birthdays as if they were thy own
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
like sometimes I wish I was allergic to latex so I wouldn't have sex with so many people..
Randomize