he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He said they were his favorite shoes.. So I threw one down the sewer. Now he'll keep searching the house for the other one. Sweet silent revenge.
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