is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
He said I kept trying to give him directions back to my house in Rhode Island, and that I started crying when he told me I live in Phoenix.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
Randomize
