she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
I hope in my next life I'm a sterile trophy wife. With a husband who showers me in wealth and gifts but can't get a hard on. Do you think my karma is good enough for that?
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
I volunteer to be the person who breaks into the room and runs around naked and has to be escorted out by police.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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