I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
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