I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
We fucked in his mom's shower and all I could think about was being too old to be sneak banging while someone's mom was out of town and how much mildew was on the shower curtain. Fuck you, Adulthood.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I will take a ruler to your dick so help me god
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