now i know why i became what i already was.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I was super proud of him for making a mature relationship decision, and then I remembered that he cheated on her. With me.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
