Say something about gay babies.
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Her throat is strong enough to gargle peanut butter. I'm sure you were satisfied.
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
Fuck man, my Dad's been single so long I get him a year's sub to a porn site every year for for Father's Day
Your anal douche was on bathroom counter. Now it's in dumpster. Not ok. I am mad. Very mad.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
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