i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
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