My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
I'm afraid you are becoming too bourgeois with your switch from boxed wine to bottled.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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