so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
vagina is talking i cant
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
There's half of a squirrel in the bathtub - i figured you'd be the one to go to.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Randomize
